Love is always been complicated. Since when I was a young girl (long time ago ha ha) I had the most weird stories ever: people leaving for the other side of the world, pilots, drummers, male best friends, and other categories that I don’t really remember at the moment.
Love for me it’s been always with a lot of drama. Well, maybe not a lot, but a good quantity of it. I guess the reason is because I liked it this way. The second reason is maybe because I always liked jerks. Urban Dictionary defines Jerks as “The kind of guy most girls ACTUALLY want when they say they want a Nice Guy”.
I totally agree with this definition and I also believe that I am looking for those kind of guys.
But recently I realized that I am getting older and I am tired.
Tired of young boys that don’t know how to deal with relationships, tired of random guys that make a short appearance in your life messing the system, tired of nights out that you regret the next morning (because everyone looks better in a dark club when you’re drunk).
I am not sure what’s next.
But I am pretty much sure that being by ourselves is much better than being with this categories of guys. Because we just let them hurt us, again and again. And then we let them treat us in a bad way and I am pretty sure no one deserves it.
You can make mistakes in life, because you are human and not perfect. And then, you can have a second chance, because I believe everyone deserves it.
No matter what you’ve done, no matter how bad you’ve behaved, if the other one really cares, then he’ll give you a second chance. Because that’s what I would do if it would have happened to me.
And then, at the end you realize how much people care or not about you. How much they wanna be involved in your life and in sharing things with you.
Because at this point, if I wanna just have fun I have a long list of numbers to call or I could just go out and find someone randomly (girls can always find someone randomly), but if I wanna be more involved (because yes, I do have a heart too!), of course I build the relationship in another way and I spend my time sharing and talking and trying to know the other one.
I truly believe that life is made for sharing. So I also believe there’s someone out there that wants to share things with you. Maybe he/she is already been in your life but you didn’t realized it, or maybe we just let people go for different reasons. Doesn’t matter, we should keep looking. Or, at least, that’s what I will do.
There are two things that I am pretty sure of: I didn’t find the right person to share my path with, for now and most important, no one deserves my tears. No one.
In the meantime, I am packing my stuff because in three days I will be home, finally!